She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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