i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
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