Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
where does the pee come out of this thing
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
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