I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Randomize
