Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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