yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
