Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize