I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
It's blow job season.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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