I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
