i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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