I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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