ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
