He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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