your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
