I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
