I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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