New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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