so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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