the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
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