I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
