the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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