OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
