does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize