It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
