I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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