With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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