we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
