hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
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