Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cock deserves a montage
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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