I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize