It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
handjob tips. give me some.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
