Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Randomize
