How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
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