he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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