I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
