is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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