i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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