I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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