she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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