you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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