Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
