theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
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