Your tits are I can't wait for
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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