How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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