Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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