Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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