butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
