I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Randomize
