i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
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don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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