i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
